Sweet Control Torn Asunder
by Alexandrina Hollingsworth
Summary: [COMPLETE: Written for the 1sentence Livejournal Community] Friend, brother, lover, acquaintance, and every other possible state of being in between it all: An exploration of the several possible relationships between the Lords Weller and Von Voltaire.


_(Um, yeah—I never intended it for it to be this long...but the story sort of...took control of itself once I got started...)_

**Title**: Sweet Control Torn Asunder  
**Author**: Alexandrina Hollingsworth  
**Fandom**: Kyou Kara Maou  
**Pairing**: Conrart Weller x Gwendal von Voltaire (see note)  
**Theme set**: Epsilon  
**Rating**: R (see warnings)  
**Summary**: Friend, brother, lover, acquaintance, and every other possible state of being in between it all: An exploration of the several possible relationships between the Lords Weller and Von Voltaire.  
**Warnings**: Although sexual references are in passing and there is nothing in great detail, the rating _is _R because of nudity, an incestuous male/male relationship, and vulgar language (I think 'bastard' is as 'vulgar' as it gets, actually). Also, a few of the themes below involve character deaths, and there may be spoilers for the Betrayal (Dai Shimaron) arc, the Shinou arc, and such.  
**Note**: _Sweet Control Torn Asunder _explores the Conrart/Gwendal relationship from several points of view: their bond as brothers, their friendship, that sort of love-hate dynamic between them, and yes, it does go so far as exploring a romantically-inclined – that is, also sexually-related – relationship between the both of them. Ah; and I might have ages wrong (if I do, blame Wikipedia...).  
**Disclaimer**: Kyou Kara Maou does not belong to me; the credit goes to Takabayashi Tomo for the original story, and to Matsumoto Temari for the original character design, and to several others who made Kyou Kara Maou what it is today. Oh! And the song in number thirty-four, "Sing", is entitled "Wait Forever", and is sung by Filipino singer Gary Valenciano.

**Sweet Control Torn Asunder  
**By Alexandrina Hollingsworth

* * *

**1.** **Motion** – Their mother had often mentioned the story to him, the story of Shinou's approval of her marriage to Conrart's father: Frequently, in fact, came the part where Ulrike said that if she _were _to marry the Weller man, her destiny would be set in motion; in recent days now, Gwendal would always close his eyes and turn away, have a small smile on his face, because he knew quite well that with Conrart's birth, it wasn't just _her _destiny that had been set in motion; _his _had been, too, and Conrart's along with it.

**2.** **Cool** – Summer in Shin Makoku had never been any of the brothers' favorite seasons, and how any man or woman in their right mind would be able to tolerate such weather was beyond Conrart's often sharp comprehension, but the fact that Gwendal was now willingly drinking severely light, crisp wine in the much cooler confines of the library of Blood Pledge helped him like the season slightly more than he ever thought he would—even for just a little while.

**3.** **Young** – The first time Gwendal had freely acknowledged the difference between his age and Conrart's—the difference of sixty-five years was truly large—had been a shock to them both: Gwendal had fallen onto his knees, his eyes dark and clouded, an action not even Conrart thought he was ever going to see in _this _lifetime, and Conrart had taken him into his arms nonetheless, an action that Gwendal was expecting the opposite of—"Neither one of us are getting younger," Conrart had said to him, "so what does it truly matter?"

**4.** **Last** – Before, back when everything between them had been just everything between them and nothing more, more often than not, the Lord Conrart Weller had been last on his organized list of priorities—after all, he'd been dubbed the best swordsman in all of Shin Makoku, and was more than able to take care of himself!—but after everything that had happened between them, everything that happened and had _meaning _between them, suddenly, treaties and signing papers were eating the dust that Conrart's name left behind as he quickly sped to the top of his brother's list.

**5.** **Wrong** – They'd opposed it, naturally, as both Conrart and Gwendal had foreseen their reactions; there was no surprise at the flaring of Wolfram's temper—that had been evident in the way that the flame element sprung to vibrant life around him, at Anissina's quick departure of the room and Günter's swift standing up and following her, at Josak's long and analyzing look, at Yuuri's shocked expression—not even, Conrart supposed, Julia's spirit condoned such a coupling, and one between _brothers _nonetheless, and there was no surprise at their mother's reaction, either: the Lady Cecilie von Spitzweig spoke few that day, but her words to Conrart and Gwendal hurt much more than the slaps that they both had received; when she'd asked whether or not they knew how wrong their relationship was, and neither one of them answered, she tilted her chin up, and with tears rolling down her cheeks, she said heavily, "_You are no longer children of mine._"

**6.** **Gentle** – From his older brother's demeanor—that cold, cruel and calculating demeanor that he always had around him—and his ever-so apathetic façade—Conrart even joked about the stony expression that was on his face, mock-fearing that it would become a permanent expression, and even mock-sadly saying he wouldn't be able to see Gwendal's smile anymore—he knew quite well that no man or woman in Shin Makoku would ever have expected the wise military leader's hands to be so soft and gentle upon contact, and he knew quite well that his brother's soft hands would not be touching any other body but his.

**7.** **One** – The darkness brought forth by the dark nights of the winter season may have left the soldiers in his army cold and afraid, but to Gwendal, the darkness only brought solace and comfort; in fact, the darkness itself bought memories from out of the blue, and the soothing wave of memories allowed the strong-willed Mazoku to feel warmth during the days when the space on his bed next to him was empty, when the darkness would bombard him with images of that first night, that first winter night when he and Conrart truly became _one_.

**8.** **Thousand** – When the formidable Lord Weller woke and saw—rather, smelled—the roses that threatened to overflow if he had been in the wrong sense of mind and had opened the windows, the Lord von Voltaire entered with one rose, this one a strikingly beautiful red unlike the coral ones that had been spread about in his lover's room, and gave him a quiet, almost inquisitive, smile; to soothe his older brother's worries, Conrart stood, plucked a red rose from the many underneath his feet, smiled, and whispered, "Whether it's one or one thousand, Gwendal—I want you, I need you, I _love _you."

**9.** **King** – Conrart simply found it amusing whenever he was able to turn Gwendal's serious train of thought into some sort of joke, and one time, when Wolfram was horseback-riding with Yuuri and Günter was being tortured by Anissina with Greta watching, during Gwendal's long talks of countries bordering Shin Makoku being invaded, Conrart told him, "As we are on the subject of kings invading lands of kings"—and then Gwendal's eyes glanced sideways at him with a raise of an eyebrow—"it seems, doesn't it, _King _Gwendal, that as your invasion of my heart has gone on for so long, it's time for you to capture it and mark it as your territory?"

**10.** **Learn** – When they were children—and these were memories that, because they were oh-so long ago, Gwendal truly did _treasure_—and Conrart was at home and not traveling somewhere with his father, he often offered to tutor his younger brother on the history, and on the very complex customs, of Shin Makoku: Although their mother often accepted his explanations of "It's my duty as his elder brother", the truth was, although Conrart was merely part Mazoku and had no trace of maryoku in his blood whatsoever, Gwendal had been liking his company more and more.

**11.** **Blur** – That day was a day that people of Shin Makoku were unable to remember without tears welling up in their eyes, or their chest constricting: If one were to have spoken with Gwendal about that subject, he would turn away and say "I don't remember anything", but people knew all too well that the Lord von Voltaire remembered every drop of blood and every clash of sword that day; it had happened so fast—he and Conrart stood, back-to-back and surrounded but ready to surrender their lives to protect their demon king—that perhaps things _were _just blurs for the Lord von Voltaire, but Shinou above, people _knew _that Conrart's dead body falling into his arms was something _clear _and resonant in Gwendal's mind.

**12.** **Wait** – Spring, as any person who lived in Blood Pledge Castle knew, was the Lord von Voltaire's favorite season, and just as they knew spring was his favorite season, those who lived in Blood Pledge also knew that no matter how hot the summer sun scorched them, how rebarbative the autumn winds got, how long and depressing the winter snows were, he would await the coming of spring; and this type of waiting was not only for spring itself, but those of Blood Pledge knew that even if it took one year or one thousand, Gwendal von Voltaire would wait for the rebirthing of his beloved's spirit into this world.

**13.** **Change** – It was never a word that brought a smile to Gwendal's lips, because 'change'—when his mother spoke it—often meant translated to "Why don't we change that gloomy dark green of your uniform to something brighter..." and it went on and on so much that Gwendal often had to escape his mother's suggestions of change using running away as his undignified method of escape, but when Conrart suggested a change in his attire—it was a drastic change from dark green to a pale sunset-hued red, although it was more on the side of 'orange' than 'red'—he didn't mind at all.

**14.** **Command** – Gwendal von Voltaire took no order or command from _anybody _unless it was truly necessary, and all of Shin Makoku knew this, and respected Gwendal's ability to escape obligation, but during one war, where his two brothers, Günter, and His Majesty had accompanied him, Conrart—with the backing of His Majesty—displayed the first reins he held over his older brother: "Gwendal, you know _very well _that His Majesty disapproves of the killing of children, whether or not they have attempted on his life, yours, or mine—_so step down_"; that had been, too, the first time Conrart had ever _dared _take that tone with him, and by the smug look that his brother had when he _did_, that wasn't going to be the last.

**15.** **Hold** – Conrart knew that his older brother wasn't one to be overly fond of the times they had together when they were children—Gwendal barely hid his intolerance of Conrart's _human _father—but Conrart held onto, quite figuratively and literally, one memory of the both of them alone, just the both of them with nobody else: Conrart was fifteen then, and Gwendal eighty, and the both of them had gone riding for, according to him, "fresh air away from studies"—Gwendal had grumbled a sort-of agreement, sort-of in the way that although he was more against the thought, Conrart forced him to; the both of them rode out to one of the forests that ended in a cliff—it had been a stupid idea on Conrart's part—and as the both of them had brought their swords, they began to spar, and with a little miscalculation by the Lord Weller, he stepped back more than was necessary, and was only hanging on the edge of the cliff with one hand: "You _clumsy _half-human," Gwendal had told him scornfully that day, but had nonetheless helped him up; and, whenever he thought of it, that one day the both of them went riding so long ago, he smiled.

**16.** **Need** – Their mother often remarked that Gwendal received his no-nonsense attitude from his father—and it was meant as more than a compliment than anything, Cecilie often reassured her eldest son—and Conrart was sure that it wasn't just the older Lord von Voltaire's no-nonsense attitude that his older brother acquired, because Gwendal certainly didn't get his shyness from their mother: Conrart knew indefinitely that if Gwendal were to need something—to actually _need _something—he would have a hard trouble voicing it, and although his brother never did ask anything of him, Conrart strode into Gwendal's study once, and as his older brother looked up with his stony face, the Lord Weller merely said, "If you need anything, Gwendal, just tell me," and he left without waiting for a response.

**17.** **Vision** – The image of the sun setting in between the mountains that were viewable from his window was something he thought beautiful, but would never admit to anyone else; he stood up and away from his chair, and positioned himself in front of the window, one hand pressed against the window and the other limply hanging: He had been so caught up in the beauty of the sunset that when Conrart entered, he did not notice; Conrart exited swiftly, but not before he cast his brother one light gaze that symbolized his happiness for his brother finding time for even the smallest sliver of peace, and then he smiled.

**18.** **Attention** – Gwendal hadn't always adored and pushed for his studies; in his bones and in his soul, he felt it, he _knew _that he was a warrior, and one day while his tutor was teaching him of the eighteenth Maou of Shin Makoku, the sound of sword ringing against sword had caught his attention, and he tilted his head slightly so that his sideways gaze could better see what was going on: His younger brother, Conrart, was teaching their youngest brother, Wolfram, how to use a sword, and the sound he'd heard earlier was Wolfram attempting to hit Conrart; Gwendal allowed himself a small smile, but quickly straightened his back and raised his chin when his tutor turned around and said, "Gwendal, _are _you paying any attention to what I'm saying?"

**19.** **Soul** – The day before Conrart was to take the Lady Suzanna Julia von Wincott's soul to Earth, he and Gwendal had a little talk about the importance of guarding a soul so pure as Julia's; many times throughout, Conrart interrupted Gwendal and often said that he knew what his eldest brother was speaking of, but Gwendal pushed on, and it was only after Conrart had completed his mission that he understood what his brother was doing: He may not have acted like it, or perhaps he never _would _act like it, but Gwendal cared about his brother's soul, about his brother, and the lecture was a way to show that he cared.

**20.** **Picture** – Gwendal von Voltaire stared with anger and every variation of the emotion thereof at the portrait of Shinou, their first Maou, and almost instinctively his hand went to his sword as his anger surged and coursed through his body, but footsteps made him straighten his back immediately, and his hand relaxed by instinct; Conrart tilted his head at his brother, and then said quietly, "Gwendal, it's been nearly three years, and His Majesty Shinou"—"His _Majesty _Shinou, indeed," Gwendal snorted with contempt—"has ceased troubling us; _that _is merely a picture of him now: He can no longer harm Shin Makoku."

**21.** **Fool** – Struck down by a poisoned arrow that not even the demon blood circulating in Gwendal's blood could filter out, Conrart and his older brother found themselves in a room, alone; and it was only the both of them: It was their only silence amongst the wars that threatened to tear Shin Makoku apart, and it was heavy, and it was deafening—Conrart stared at his brother, afraid to breathe and afraid to blink, afraid that in the moment it took him to rapidly open and close his eyes, his brother would simply fade away; and Gwendal's breathing began to mellow out, began to soften, until not even with his strained hearing could he catch even a small sound of it; Conrart bowed his head, and whispered angrily, "Gwendal, you _fool_."

**22.** **Mad** – Dark indigo eyes stared at Blood Pledge Castle as Gwendal and Conrart returned from their scouting of the city, and although his face was lethargic in all entirety, those dark indigo depths were ablaze with emotion, and the golden aura of his earth maryoku formed around him; Conrart reined his horse in to stop next to his older brother, and heaved a great sigh as he stared at the smoke that hovered above Blood Pledge—"Anissina, again, I suppose?"—and Gwendal merely growled.

**23.** **Child** – Conrart knew that, on rare days, one could often catch his brother knitting—_something _or other—in his room, and as the Weller man entered Gwendal's quietly, indigo eyes met brown orbs, the indigos widening considerably as Gwendal stuffed the—_bearbee?_—he was attempting to knit underneath his blanket; his jaw clenched as his eyes narrowed at Conrart, obviously questioning the other man's presence in his room, and Conrart smiled, "It's good to be a child whenever you can, Gwendal; you never know when peace ends and war starts all over again."

**24.** **Now** – The angle that the moonlight fell on his younger brother's face only enhanced Conrart Weller's beauty as Gwendal straddled him: Gwendal leaned down using one hand to balance him, the other sliding teasingly down Conrart's body, firmed by years and years of experience in the military, down to his navel where brown curls led down to his hardened shaft, and Gwendal touched it briefly before Conrart growled, pulled him in swiftly for a kiss, and when the both of them were panting by the end of it, Conrart commanded harshly, "_Now_, Gwendal."

**25.** **Shadow** – Blood Pledge Castle was awkwardly quiet, more so than it had ever been as Shibuya Yuuri was still king—but not even that—it didn't matter to him anymore that Yuuri was, of all people, _Conrart's_ godson, and it hurt just to _think _of his name now—not even that, or Yuuri himself, could coax the military leader Gwendal von Voltaire out of the library: Fiercely-powered maryoku prevented even Günter's attempts of opening the door, and once Gwendal supposed that the king realized he didn't want to speak to anyone about the matter of, well, his _funeral _of all things, they all left; Gwendal sighed to himself as he stared at the pale crescent moon hovering above him, and then he turned around, staring at the pale candle that cast a shadow on the table—"You're one _bastard _of an idiot, Conrart Weller."

**26.** **Goodbye** – Conrart never thought the very word itself, for his entire lifetime, would _ever _escape his older brother's lips, and he never thought that, for the _rest _of his entire lifetime, he would never feel the shivers down his spine, nor the empty feeling in his heart, nor the feeling that his gut had been punched, when Gwendal rode off for battle, his dark indigo eyes forlorn and—_hoping?_—and something, and his voice only the faintest of whispers as he told his brother, and only his brother, "If we don't come back from this, then"—he paused, took a breath, shuddered, and then stared Conrart squarely in the eyes—"then I suppose _this _is our final goodbye, Lord Conrart Weller."

**27.** **Hide** – "I _hope_," said Gwendal tersely as Conrart looked at him sheepishly, the Weller lord reaching up and scratching his head, Gwendal's indigo eyes piercing through him as though they were poisonous arrows and he was some sort of translucent air that was just _there_, "that you realize," and by this time his tone had become _much _colder than it had been earlier, "that I am _not _responsible for saving _your _hide once _Mother _finds out that you and your..._friend _have trampled over her _garden _like the pair of clumsy, troublemaking trolls that you _are_, _Conrart_"; and Conrart merely kept on looking at Gwendal sheepishly as he sighed, knowing there was no way he was going to be sheltered by his brother today.

**28.** **Fortune** – Conrart was going hunting with Dan Hiri Weller, again—with _that _man, again—and apparently Wolfram had risen much earlier than he to wave "good luck" to him; and so Gwendal found himself, later, standing in the shadow of the great archway that was the entry into Blood Pledge, and Conrart turned his head sharply as his horse neighed, signaling the arrival of the eldest of the three; Gwendal's lips thinned as Conrart looked at him hopefully, before he gave up and sighed: "Do know that whatever I'm wishing for you on this hunt, it really _isn't _ill fortune, _Conrart_."

**29.** **Safe** – Thunder had never been anything that Conrart was able to enjoy—it was something that, although he was round eighteen now, he was still often ashamed to admit; but he couldn't just appear in his mother's—and, now, his new father's—room and just ask whether or not he would be able to stay with them for the night, because Shinou only knew what they were going to do in there, or were already doing before he'd entered; and so he exited his room, and his feet took him to the only other path he knew well enough to go to, even with his eyes closed—his older brother, Gwendal's; and Gwendal's door was already opened before Conrart could even knock—and for once in a blue moon, Gwendal had a gentle expression on his face, his person pleasant that night, and soothing, and as the Lord von Voltaire soothed his brother to sleep, he spoke only the sweetest of nothings: "You'll be safe here, for tonight, Conrart."

**30.** **Ghost** – The war between Mazoku and human had taken its toll in Shin Makoku's young war strategist; the others may not have noticed much of a change in Gwendal's demeanor, but Conrart knew it by instinct—and whenever Gwendal's haunted blue-violet eyes stared at him with that helpless look in them, and when Conrart could see the heavy bags that were forming under Gwendal's eyes, Conrart knew that because of the horrors of that lone war, Gwendal was no longer the Gwendal Conrart knew as a brother—this one was merely a ghost, or even the slightest whisper of a ghost, that had once been his brother.

**31.** **Book** – The strong-willed, stoic mask that was always on Gwendal's face had already slipped off several times, and although—as one often despised because of his human heritage—Conrart had no right to say anything about it, he had softly murmured, "You're a bit easy to read when you let yourself go, Gwendal," in hopes that the other had not heard him, but Gwendal's light chuckle from behind the book he was reading made Conrart jump in surprise, his eyes wide and sweat instantly running down the side of his face.

**32.** **Eye** – Gwendal winced, his left hand instinctively going up to the area of skin just right beside his left eye, and he frowned; Conrart turned to the right to catch a glimpse of his older brother's left eye hurting, and no sooner did that happen, his left arm began tingling, and then coursing, with pain, and he flinched, because there was only reason as to why the keys to the Four Forbidden Boxes would be hurting so much like they were now—_So it's come to this, then_, he thought sourly as Gwendal said to his inquiry of whether or not something was wrong, "No, it's nothing."

**33.** **Never** – It was one of _those_ arguments—those pointless arguments that left Gwendal with his golden aura flaring and Conrart's hand darting immediately to his sword; they were arguing about Suzanna Julia—of _course _they were, they _always _were—and before Gwendal could retort, Conrart exploded—and these moments were as rare as one would see Gwendal laughing in public—and his eyes, even if it were just an illusion, seemed as though they were glowing: "And what would _you_ know of this, Gwendal—_you _who has never felt the feeling that you would gladly throw yourself into a pit of—of, I don't know, the sharpest spears ever crafted—just to save the one you love the most?"; and Conrart immediately regretted it as he saw the put-down look in his brother's indigo eyes.

**34.** **Sing** – The spring months of Shin Makoku had come early, and the cheerfulness that it brought to Blood Pledge was obvious everywhere—Conrad Stands Upon the Earth, Secret Gwendal, and Beautiful Wolfram bloomed side by side, forming a pleasant pattern of colors on the gardens of the castle, and as Gwendal walked around the grounds of the castle, a slow voice caught his attention, and instantly and almost instinctively, his feet had begun to drag him toward the more secluded area of Blood Pledge's gardens; underneath the large tree in the middle of the garden, he caught his brother Conrart with a wistful expression on his face, and it was only then that Gwendal realized the smooth voice was his: "So while I can, I'll take the chance, I'm di_ving _in; if you need me, I _will _die—to feel _alive _again."

**35.** **Sudden** – All the movement ceased that one moment Shinou's silhouette began to appear in the dark cloud of Soushu's maryoku: It was so silent that a pin could be heard dropping, and everything was so still—none of those gathered in Shinou's temple dared to _breathe _at all—and suddenly it was all just pain, the unbearable kind, the kind that threatened to rip you apart into pieces then and there and then rip _those _pieces up against and against, and before Gwendal and Conrart knew it, Gwendal's left eye was unable to see, and Conrart's left arm was unable to function.

**36.** **Stop** – Gwendal and Conrart were heading the army this time, and both brothers were ready to fight: Gwendal with his literally earth-shattering maryoku, Conrart with his unsurpassed skills with a sword; their younger brother, Wolfram, and their king, Yuuri, had headed east, while Günter, royal advisor, headed to the west, and Adelbert von Grantz covered them from behind; swords pierced through flesh as the grounds beneath them opened, and then balls of flame erupted in the sky—Conrart's eyes widened as he shouted his older brother's name; Wolfram's balls of flames meant only one thing—"Conrart," said Gwendal from his steed as Conrart began to ride the horse in the direction of his brother and his godson, "_stop _them from coming any closer to Blood Pledge; at _any _cost."

**37.** **Time** – "Time and _time _again," Gwendal's voice was fierce as he stared at Conrart, his dark glare bringing down the temperature in the room as Conrart shivered visibly, "I have _told _you, _Lord Weller_," and the 'lord' in Conrart's title was more mocking than revering, if his title would ever be spoken in a revered way by the higher-raking Lord von Voltaire anyway, "that His Highness, our Regent, the Lord Stoffel von Spitzweig, _commands _your troop to stay"—and before Conrart could say anything about it, Gwendal slapped his desk with so much force that it threatened to break apart, and he growled, "_This is not just about the Lady Suzanna Julia von Wincott, Lord Weller._"

**38.** **Wash** – Although the baths in his private chambers could not match the grandeur of His Majesty's, to Gwendal, it sufficed; the pool was large enough for at least three or four people—he'd never had the need for that size, but he appreciated the size so that he often had time to stretch and relax, to have a moment to himself without thinking about the politics and the treaties and the affairs of Shin Makoku and its bordering countries; but once he and Conrart had—what was the best way to put it, now?—'gotten together', he supposed was the best way to say it, he was becoming more and more accustomed to having his younger brother in that large bath in his private chambers, and even more to that, he had been accustomed to hearing Conrart's smooth voice, saying, "Gwendal, shall I wash your back for you?"

**39.** **Torn** – "_This _is no time for the war council of Shin Makoku to be torn apart by such foolish beliefs, _Your Majesty_"; his was the only voice that resounded in the cold meeting room, and although he saw his king flinch back and his eyes showed only hurt at—at not being able to convince Gwendal to spare the lives of those humans who had _dared _cross the border and burn down Blood Pledge castle from within; "_you _have seen what they have nearly done to us—to _you_—and _this _is our only option"; but Conrart was not convinced, his brown eyes ablaze with the determination to have his king's wish fulfilled, his footsteps following his brother's as he neared the exit to the room: "_Gwendal_"—and Gwendal slammed the door in his face.

**40.** **History** – Conrart's now half-lidded eyes clouded with the lascivious pleasure running through his body, and Gwendal gave him a slow smile: Gwendal's mouth found the crook of Conrart's neck, and as he clamped down with his teeth, the Weller lord arched, their arousals grinding together—and both men gave a salacious moan; Gwendal gently nuzzled his brother's neck for a while, looking up once ever so often to see inquiring eyes, and the von Voltaire lord gave him a small smile before capturing his mouth in a kiss—and the rest, they say, is just history.

**41.** **Power** – Conrart knew and merely knew from stories that the maryoku his brother Gwendal possessed was great; but on the battlefield that day, that one day where his brother was at his peak, Conrart knew just how true those stories were, about the Lord von Voltaire's golden-hued maryoku entering the earth and splitting it apart—and for one fleeing moment, one very small fleeting moment that the Weller youth—and he was still truly a youth compared to his older brother—hoped he would never have to endure again, Conrart regretted having a human father.

**42.** **Bother** – Gwendal was never one for meanings that were hidden behind only the most grandiloquent of words; he preferred to be straightforward when it came to things such as—_Damn it all...why now, when we have just achieved peace?_—war, and he preferred that no distractions came in between him and his work; and so when Conrart came in, a drink—it looked like wine—in his hand, Gwendal bit his lip, but nonetheless spoke, "Conrart, I have no time for your interruptions; don't bother me"; and it was all he could do to ignore the look of hurt in his brother's eyes.

**43.** **God** – All those who lived at Blood Pledge Castle knew how terrifying everything became when the Lord Gwendal von Voltaire set free his anger, his annoyance; Conrart was witness to this eruption of his brother's but only one: He knew that Gwendal was going to be more Rhadamanthine than ever with his personal guards—he saw it in his brother's eyes as Gwendal exited his personal quarters—and later on, he heard a horrible roar of anger, and plates dropped and chandeliers shook as the very foundation of Blood Pledge itself shook; Gwendal von Voltaire was no god, and Conrart knew that, but he thought quietly to himself, _He might as well be._

**44.** **Wall** – Between the two brothers, there had always been a large wall several thousands of feet thick that separated them: Gwendal, with his pride in being an unadulterated Mazoku and his vehement dislike of the humans, and Conrart, with his honor to preserve and loyalty to prove as a half-human child; but then their new Maou had come along, and suddenly, it was as though that large wall began crumbling—even if it was just slowly and slightly in the beginning.

**45.** **Naked** – "You can dress up as much as you want," said Conrart in a husky voice as he cornered his older brother on the outskirts of a party Blood Pledge was hosting to celebrate Yuuri's eighteenth birthday, and although Conrart remained in his usual light brown uniform, Gwendal had taken an initiative from their mother—fashionable as always, Lady Cecilie was—and had changed from the dark green of his uniform to a well-tailored red suit with a dark cape behind him; "but no matter how much clothes you'll put on," Conrart continued, pressing his face into the crook of Gwendal's neck, "you and I both know they'll just be on the floor tonight."

**46.** **Drive** – Before the whole forbidden relationship with his brother had been started at all, Gwendal hadn't longed for anything, had not craved for the touch of either man or woman, had not craved for lips to touch his own, had not craved for a body that melted so perfectly well into his, but after Conrart came along—and Conrart just _had _to come along—he yearned for those things: Yearned for Conrart's touch, his lips, his _body_—and it drove him mad.

**47.** **Harm** – Quiet days underneath the shade of the large tree in the middle of one of Blood Pledge's various gardens were days that Gwendal and Conrart had come to treasure; it had been one of those days, actually, when Gwendal had wrapped his arm around Conrart's shoulders, teasingly calling him 'Conrad' for the sake of saying the king's nickname for him, and Gwendal leaned closer to Conrart's ear, his hot breath sending an electrifying feeling down his spine, "No harm will ever befall you again—not while _I'm _here."

**48.** **Precious** – To him, Conrart was no different from their mother the Lady von Spitzweig: Where Gwendal would gladly give his life to save his mother's, he found himself believing he would do the same to Conrart; where Gwendal would do anything—and he really did mean anything—to prevent his mother from crying, he found himself wanting to do the same sort of comforting to Conrart; and where Gwendal found his mother a precious jewel to be treasured and cherished, he found himself, undoubtedly, feeling the same way about his younger brother.

**49.** **Hunger** – Whenever he could avoid it, Gwendal preferred dining alone; he needed not the luxury of conversation unless it was to discuss the possible futures of Shin Makoku and her neighboring countries, and needed not the annoyance of the king's and his younger brother's useless 'lover's quarrels' that Günter had come accustomed to calling them; and although he knew he could think of so many reasons to say no to Conrart's offer to join him in his chambers to dine, Gwendal found that he had no way of converting thoughts into words.

**50.** **Believe** – _"Do you believe in destiny, Gwendal?" – "Is there some humanly reason that I should believe in something like that, Conrart?" – "I was hoping you did, because I believe there is_ _a perfectly human reason as to why you'd believe in something like destiny." – A quirk of the lips, "Oh? And what would that be?" – A sheepish smile, and a rather darling blush, "You; me; us."_

**Fin**

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_04/01/2007 – 04/05/2007  
_Text © Alexandrina Hollingsworth


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